Life.

Sometimes I have moments where I suddenly realize I basically have no idea what I'm doing with my life. My dreams and aspirations seem to change with each new day and mood I am in. I dream of everything from journalism to counseling to traveling the world to teaching to creating art, and more. I've switched my major more times than I even remember, and the weird thing is that I've actually enjoyed every one of them. I feel like I've had so many unique experiences, jobs, and opportunities, but they are scattered out over a broad range of subjects. Sometimes I love this fact, and other times I think "Where is this going?" I only have one year left of my undergraduate studies, and that freaks me out a little. But I guess that's all part of life, right?

When I grow up, I want to:

1) Have a garden with vegetables, fruit trees, berries, herbs, and lots of pretty flowers.
2) Have a cute little pug
3) Cook a lot
4) Go on walks with someone special
5) Travel. Everywhere.
6) Learn to play the piano better
7) Give.
8) Always have flowers in the house
9) Drink lots of tea
10) Sit on the beach and talk with God
11) Have a fish tank with a school of tiny, bright blue fish
12) Write handwritten letters to people I love
13) Write more in general
14) Still be best friends with my sister
15) Visit people I care about as often as possible
16) See and talk with my parents often
17) Have lots of kids
18) Love art even more passionately than I do now
19) And more...

Wish Upon a Dream

I have stumbled across another poem I wrote while studying at High Sierra last Spring. Although I have always been such a logical minded person, I have come to discover there lies a dreamer within me. This poem is but a glimpse of this dreamer inside.


Standing in this vast and opportune world,
My mind ponders past hopes and future dreams
Wondering where my life will next be hurled,
And knowing what results is what God deems.
I look up and wish upon a lone star,
Asking for a life of love, beauty, joy;
More than the stars in the glorious sky
The dreams in my young and hopeful heart are,
Some live exposed while others remain coy,
And yet their presence I cannot deny.

Dreams both vast and small lay amidst my soul,
In hope of emerging and coming true;
Oh, beautiful, boundless dreams to console
And comfort victims in need of rescue,
To dance among flowers of the meadows
And to freely sing the tune of my heart,
To fill a dark world with laughter and love
And shoot the scorned with Cupid’s sharp arrows,
To speak the unspeakable through my art
And bring true delight to the King above.

Only through Him can these dreams be achieved,
And only through grace will this hope remain;
Will my heart’s desires soon be relieved?
And which dreams will I lose or retain
Here in a life that seems but a moment?
And so now I will continue twirling
Down the path that is narrow and straight
Grasping hope of dreams fulfilled, being patient
At this stage of not reaping, but sowing;
As for now, in this heart my dreams shall wait.